Dating playing it cool
But, you and I both know that your friends give you some of the worst advice when it comes to dating and relationships. They don’t understand your behavior as well as they think they do.
Throughout my entire life, whenever a woman did not move at the speed that I was moving, I got disinterested.
You meet a man on a first date and he’s smitten with you. You stand a MUCH better chance of getting somewhere with him if you’re your BEST self than if you’re the needy, nervous version of you.
Playing it cool looks like laughing at something you don’t actually think is funny, like a racist joke.Play it cool by maintaininga low-key tone, and challengehim to prove how smart he is by saying"That's a curious choice. " By questioninghim (instead of going all awestruck),you'll trigger his competitive instincts.It doesn't matter how drop-deadsexy your outfit is."But that can make aguy feel pressured, and being pressuredinto a relationship is somethingmany men worry about." The smartermove? Refusing to be wowed easily willsend the message that not only are younot pressuring him, but you may evenbe slightly out of reach."Because menare biologically hardwired to be competitive,they need to feel like they'remaking the choice to be with you andthen working toward winning youover," says John Amodeo, Ph D, authorof "You need togive a guy the space to do that." Insteadof focusing on him, pay just as much(and, at times, even more) attention toothers around you, advises clinicalpsychologist Belisa Vranich, Psy D,author of And when he mentions having donesomething undeniably awesome, likestudying abroad in Nepal, resist theurge to gush about how amazing thatmust have been.
Yeah, you’re nervous, but you’re just being “real” with him. He’s just being real – and he’s really, really, really excited about you. In fact, it’s far better to have a guy who is excited about you than one who is NOT excited about you!